For the listener, who listens in the snow,

So I log on last night... grind a little honor... Mabd is close to completing the must have set stuff, and Maj needs about 2k honor to respec frost. And Unbound, poor nub, will need as much damn honor as she can carry.

And I get a /w from Melvin. "We needa nother dps fer Kara..."

K, a bit o background. When last we kara'd, mabd was part of the guild of guilds, the doomed guild, that broke up ina big way cuz it so sucked. I dragged my chars into a pvp guild that promptly shut down, and then into an rpg guild that was filled with hopeless hosers.

Melvin went into a nice big raiding guild that was just about to get Gruul on farm status.

Anyway, Melvin's guild split. Leaving just enough to kara.... most of the time. So last night they were down a player, and asked noble Mabd, she of the quiver of almost endless pain, if she'd fill in.

Mabd v Kara. She's killed as far as curator. Shes halfway to revered, and that sweet sweet violet eye ammo... so what the hell... i said yes. They were gonna start at curator, this would let me get some quests done, and maybe jump start the whole faction thing.

Cuz you know... I've forgotten what its like to be ina party with Melvin...

Now really, the stupid was flying fast and thick... and the latest candidate for the throne of the emperor of all n00bs was a boomkin who not only rolled on all the melee dps gear, but also had a single epic item equipped... gloves that had +str and +expertise.

He had very little +int gear, and ran outta mana all the time. Also, he was doin curator/shade with only 7.5 health, buffed.

But no, the laughs came with Melvin... who has yet to download a totem addon for his shammy.

Me... 6 months ago.. "Ya really need a totem addon..."
3 months ago.. "Ya really need a totem addon..."
Last week... "Ya really need a totem addon..."

So last night, every 3 min during curator and shade...

Raidleader: "Melvin, please drop a mana and wrath of air totem..."

Of course, the best time came after the first wipe on curator... healers ran outta mana. So they swapped the healer outta the tank/melee group to the caster group, and pulled melvin's ele shammy into the tank/melee group.

K... now to lay the bets... what was the class/build of the character melvin got replaced by? Maybe melvin's comment will shed some light on the mystery...

Melvin... "That was stupid... my wrath of air totem really helps the caster group... it was idiotic to pull me out!"

Me... "Ima sure the resto shammy that took your spot so the casters would have another mana tide totem (there were two resto shammies on the raid) will remember to add his wrath of air to the tranquil air totem the other guy was casting... its not like you remember to keep it up, anyway..."

Anyway, I had fun, even if I played way too late... and finally downed Shade and got to do the chess event. Which was a blast... I might try prince with em tonight, tho I doubt they'll have the stones for it...

That is blowing in the same bare place

K, listen up rugrats...

/nervouscough

Um... it's come to my attention that you are ill informed on some vital differences between us, and the NPC's.

I mean, really, haven't yuir parents talked to you about this already? Or school? The demo's have held congress fer two years, one would expect this to be taught in kindergarden... like they say, itsa health issue. We can't let you go out there unprepared...

/embarass

Oh man. How did I get roped into this? Oh yeah...

HIM.

And the post.

Cmon kids... doan lookit me with those wide eyes... creeps me out. Like this aint stressful enough on me. Alright... the pitch goes something like this.

"You are getting old enough to be undergoing new... experiences. You've just gotten talent points, and now your hearing the older kids talk about something mysterious and exotic called... instances.

Alright. It is PERFECTLY NATURAL to be curious at this age. And be warned. This conversation might confuse you. Or embarass you. Or exite you. Please, dark lady, doan let it excite you. If you get excited, there's probably something wrong with you. Ima sure they have a pill for that... they have a pill for everything these days...

Anyway. There comes a time ina toon's life when you find the company of other toons, of different classes (not that there's anything wrong with hanging with your own class! doan sue me, plz!) ... well, the company of other toons.... stimulating.

And one thing leads to another, from "let's kill this elite.." to "killing 25 of these goes so much faster with company" to "wow, yuir sword is so long and pointy... all I have are these fireballs..."

And then SOMEONE starts talking about Ragefire Chasm, or Dead Mines. Sometimes itsa new "friend." Sometimes its one of those quest givers that had been helpin ya out all along, only to tell ya this time, "bring friends."

OK. This is the way life works kiddies. By the time your all growed up, you have grouped with all sorts of peeps. Some helpful and nice, and end up on yuir friends list, some not so nice, and leave ya crying alone in yuir room after a ninja roll. "Was it me? I did everything they asked of me... maybe I was too easy!"

Now, some people hold that casual grouping is the best way to develop a self-confident toon. These people are wildly ignorant about the dangers, emotional and otherwise, that come from...

/hushvoice

Pugging.

I mean, Ima talking keyloggers, viruses, bad talent builds, and high repair costs. Its much better to take your time, and wait for the right players. Sure, sometimes this means you get things done a little later than other, sluttier, toons. But just look at some of these "well developed" puggers. Hanging out in back alleys, looking for some old pervo to provide "just another SM run."

No. Keep yuir self respect.

So anyway... what you need to know. When ya look for toons to group with, you gonna need certain people to play certain roles. And the most important of these is... healing.

/embarass

I mean, really, can't yuir grandpoppy BRK give this lecture?

What was that Bobby? Yeah, he does smell funny... hey, its not his fault. Dwarves never really got into the habit of bathing... so he never saw the need to bathe the pet regularly. Anda cat starts to smell funky about a week after a major blood bath. Anyway, he's yuir elder and you will respect him! Cept when he gets all drooly and talks about that whole air force thingy.

Alright. There are four classes in WoW that can heal. Priest, Druid, Shaman, and Paladin.

No, Bobby... Warlocks can't heal. No, I doan care that they usually lead BG's in healing. Thassa something else... tho I remember one time when I was... er... watching yuir Aunt Braids during one of her crazier, more experimentive phases...

/happythoughts

I wonder if she still has that wildheart set?

Anyway...

There are, however, only two healing classes. Thats right... Priests and Druids.

Whats the difference between a class that can heal and a healing class? Well, lookit the post again. Thassa heal offa Balance build druid. Unbound, the nifty enhance shammy, crits on heals for about 3200. The tree hugger is even 6 levels lower than Unbound. And has same +heal. Unbound even has more points in the resto tree than lifebloom bunny. Doan matter. Outclassed, healing wise.

True, the druid spell is longer cast time. But you need to realize... Druids are a HEALING class. Like priests, it doan matter where the talent points are... they can heal anything short of an end game instance with the right gear.

Shammies and pallies are NOT healing classes. Their heals are painfully weak, mana inefficient, and extremely primitive. A druid or priest can heal you up and down, over and over. Oh man... they heal you so good...

/happythoughts

Shammies and pallies need talent points in the right tree to keep up. And somewhere around the point where you answer "yes" to the question "are you holy/resto?" are the talents that do something like...

5/5 Yuir heals no longer suck. Congrats! Isn't this much better than doin damage?

This is not so say that shammies and pallies can't play healing roles. A shammy or pally can keep a tank up for a goodly time if the main healer goes down... but doan count on the other party members living. Chain heal without the talent points is like a hunter pet that can't learn growl. Sooner or later, you forget why it's there...

Anyway.. that's the lecture. Ifn ya get desperate enough to press an enhance shammy or ret pally into a healing role... remember... they'll be a bit uncomfortable. Go slow. Use elixirs.

Oh, and safety words are always useful.

Full of the same wind

"You might feel a stinging sensation... that's just pride, fucking with you..."

I got ganked. My poor Unbound, 69 shammy, got jumped bya 70 NE Warrior.

Named Lionelle.

Guild name... "Leader of the Thundercats"

Thatsa gona hurt for a long long long time.

Which is the sound of the land

Fine. Story wars! And then here... You won't beat me, allies! FOR THE HORDE! (at least i think kirk plays blue side... who the hell can tell?)

Er... beforehand... any suggestions on where to get a new sig? My old place is down due to problems with armory...

Now then... itsa pretty well established concept that drinking and driving is a bad thing. The problem is... drinking is a bad thing. Itsa tried and true Dagashai precept that people are stupid. Itsa tried and true human precept that booze makes ya less clever. Put both these together, and ya get the extended corollary... stupid people + booze = mass n00bness.

K, ima workin late. I look out the front of the store, and I see headlights shining into my lot from the pizza joint next door. So... theresa car parked at the pizza joint, facing my c-store lot, shining its lights.

You have to understand... when you work night shift at a place that gets robbed, sure as rain, you get a bit techy. A car parked next door, but right next to my store is as close to "parked outta sight of the about to be shot c-store clerk" as you can get. So I noticed. And 15 min later, I noticed that it was still there, lights still shining. So I open the door to the store and take a quick look outside... and I hear it. An engine racing. I go all the way outside. Thersa driver slumped behind the wheel of the car, lights on, engine racing, cuz its in park and his foot has the pedal to the metal. And its been this way for some time...

So I call the cops. Cuz the way the guy is parked, if the car slips into gear, he'll prob crash into the front of the store.

The cops show, pull him outta the car. He was so drunk that he passed out after he got into the car and started it. Thankfully he never got it into gear. The cops told him to nap for a few hours, then get some coffee and get home. So he came into the store right before I left in the morning.

"You know, you really need to get it checked out. Running at full for that long in park can't have been good for the engine..."

"It's O.K. Itsa rental."

Part the second. The pizza delivery guys from the above mention pizza joint parked behind their store. There was a little access road for the apartment buildings and bars... so on a delivery, they'd drive behind the c-store and come out at the corner.

So one nice night, one of the pizza guys came in and said... "Dude, looks like someone got jacked on the side of your store!"

I went outside to look and, sure enough, next to the dumpster was a car, door open, keys in door, witha guy, half in, half out, head on the concrete, bleeding all over the place.

I call ems... they show. The next day, the guy comes through the store... it turns out he hadn't been mugged... he just slammed his head into the car trying to get in, and knocked himself out. The massive amount of booze helped as well...

"Why did you call the ambulance! Do you know how much they charged me?"

"Er... sir... do you have your car?"

"Yeah, there it is outside..."

"Do you have your wallet?"

"Yeah, right here..."

"Do you think you would have either of those if you'd been out on that street another 15 minutes, key in car door and wallet in hand, and you all helpless?"

He shut up then.

Ya see... its all about helping people....

In the sound of a few leaves,

Where everybody knows yuir name...

What was that Rats? Yeah, flightmasters... great people... much more interesting than bartenders!

Of any misery in the sound of the wind,

Well, hell.

BRK went and posted an amazing little non-wow story.

Now I may not have much... not uber wow smarts like BRK, or l33t pvp skills like Braids... but I got my pride. And my stories. And I'll be damned if I let a dwarf top me.

K... I worked at a C-Store... one of the most dangerous jobs in the country. Not bragging, just saying. However... even after 5 years... I was unprepared...

It was a regular friday party night. LSU was in session, football season was over, so the crowds were large but controllable. I was alone in the store and parked out in front were twin cop cars keepin an eye on 2k drunk teenagers. In comes a young man who enters the store and collapses on the floor, begging piteously for someone to save him. "They're after me!"

K... by this point in my life, I really, literally, had had people attacked by mobs in front of my store. I'd even let people into the store, locked the doors, and watched people try to break down the door with a concrete trash can. One of my co-workers, a 70 lb 50ish woman, had once blocked the doors with her body in one of the more memorable occasions... so when this crap happens, I get extreme...

I hopped out from behind the register, and rush to the doors to barricade them in the face of whatever was coming...

And it was nothing. Parking lot empty, more or less. Two cop cars still out there... about 3-400 teens across the street, but this wasn't unusual, and they weren't comin over to my direction...

So I look at Mr. "Help Me!'... and he screams again, and begs me to save him from the mob.

Now at this point... look people. I'm making a buck over minimum wage. I really, really, really am NOT BEING PAID for this crap. I ask Rick, who was hanging out as usual, to go get the cops. On the other side of my nice clean, empty of vicious mobs parking lot. Then the nice men in blue come into the store, and escort the unfortunate young person to safety...

All over right?

Well... three hours later, all the crowds are gone, Ima cleaning up, and into my store comes an angry 50ish man who proceeds to yell at me...

"My son came into this store, BEGGING FOR HIS LIFE, and you let a mob drag him outside and beat him! HE'S IN THE HOSPITAL NOW!"

I check my wallet... like $4. So if they sue... they ain't gettin much. As for criminal liability... not sure there was any.

While these thoughts are goin through my mind, the guy is goin on about what a POS I am, and how much a failure of a human being I revealed myself to be by not protecting his offspring.

I look out in the parking lot... my cop buddies are still out there.

I wait for the gentleman to pause for breath... and point out to the parking lot.

"What?"

I point again.

The guy for real, couldn't recognize that there were honest to god, true blue, police officers about 70' away. And that during this whole rant about how c-store clerks have a moral and legal obligation to defend the detrius of society, he couldn't recognize America's true defenders.

At this point I wonder if this was a trait the kid had inherited, cuz he woulda have to had run past the cop cars to get into the store, and "safety."

So the guy starts yelling at me, and I shut him up by slamming my mop on the counter and screaming back...

"Look in the parking lot, you dick! See the cops? They've been here ALL GODDAMN NIGHT. Anything that happened to yuir stupid kid happened in front of them! Now go bother them, cuz they have two things I doan... patience and pepper spray!"

Later I get the full story from my peeps in blue. The kid had done some weird homoerotic thing in front of a buncha frat kids at the bar across the street. Words were exchanged, and the kid fled in terror... with no one following. The cops dragged him outta my store, told him to get lost and not to come back... but couldn't MAKE him. So he decided to go back across the street... and vandalize cars in the bar's parking lot. In front of everyone.

Ya know... ya can't fix stupid.

Of the January sun; and not to think

Wow... haven't played much this week, and yet all sorta drama goin on.

Some idiot got under the killer's skin. Ima not entirely sure, but I think she can kill people by simply speaking their name ina certain tone of voice. Anyway, it took me the longest time to figure out why she plays allies... current theory is that it was a blizzard implemented faction balance thing.

I got on last night... AV BG quest night. So log Mabd, and spend my time waiting for the 40 min queue doin some fishin... hit zangar for the flotsam pools to finally get that "track fish" skill... then roam Nagrand looking for Icefin Bluefish so Maj can have some more buff foodies :)

Also pick up a primal and half of water... I wonder if they tweaked the fishing rate on water motes?

Then the BG pops... and itsa lag city. I mean... I've havent seen lag this bag since living in Ironforge back before the AH got split between major cities... even then...

And so the confession... I failed you all... the greatest pvp screenshot of all time, and I was s0 stunned, I didn't get it.

How bad was the lag? DREK himself came out and started capping ally pig dogs around the relief hut flag. It was only after that I thought... holy crap! A screenshot of Drek next to the RH flag woulda been a lovely present for my friends!

Anyway... blizz... ya know that little modification ya made to improve latency?

I daon think it workin so well...

The spruces rough in the distant glitter

First, mea culpa, mea maxi culpa.

Kirk, sorry, came across yuir wonderful posts via Jabari. I try to give credit where credit is due, and believe me, yuir posts on macro writing are fantabulous.

Second, I think I've discovered something... shocking...

Lately, at least on my server, there's been a swarm of locks and druids leveling. What's Herk's alt? A druid. His BFF? A lock. What's Melvin's current alts? Lock and Druid. Now druids are their own little thing. But locks...

Cmon. How goddamn difficult can it be to play a halfway decent lock? Really? It aint like a hunter, you won't break your own fear or anything. (Ha.. see the joke? I kill myself sometimes.... break a fear... good lord, where does the genius come from?)

So anyway, Unbound still has the Slave Pen side of Missing in Action to finish. And Ima kinda anal bout finishing quests. So Unbound, the 68 shammy gets into a group for Slave Pens... 62 pally tank, 61 rogue, 61 lock, 65 feral druid healing, and Unbound.

Now I was thinking that they were kinda low for the instance. But i wasn't sure. Turns out, bosses are 64, so 61 is suck too low for this crap. Two wipes to first boss, Melonmelon the Betrayer. Wipe ON first boss. At this point... (unfamiliar with slave pens...) er... what was the deal with that guy? Druid pipes in... ya gotta kill the totems...

K, second try. Rogue on totems. And since we got murk boy only down to 80% on first try, I tell em Ima tanking. Bam. Beat beat heal. Beat beat heal. Rogue goes down. Druid goes oom. Pally.. well I had no idea what that fool was doin. But I was keeping ahead of the mob. Ground totem when he cast, and a quick heal, keepin my mana bar up with water shield, cast shaman fury and elemental when appropriate... I was legend. Screw the spartans, you wanna see desperate hour, take a peep at unbound some time.

Friggin 3 min later, the druid is killin totems, and I'm at end of rope. I die with boss at 2% and rest of party (minus rogue) can't seal the deal.

We wipe. End of run as druid and I give up in disgust. And I remember thinking... where the hell was the lock dps? The lock ended the battle with FULL HEALTH and NO MANA. (well, he ended the battle dead, but when I died, he hada full health bar) What the hell? And this is not the first time I've been in a party with a useless lock. Are they the new huntard? I mean, the fool refused to give out healthstones, got his imp killed all the time, and couldn't dps his way outta paper bag. This is the sign of the lock apocalypse. When everyone is playing one, the nerf hammer is gonna get summoned.

Nother bitch fest on that useless piece of crap pally. If you CANNOT hold aggro OFFA THE DAMN HEALER, you are NOT A TANK. Thats the first test of tankness. If the healer draws aggro keeping just you alive, you suck. Turn it in and respec holy. Even with an off spec healer. No excuse. Yui'll be screw all good if ya get a real dps in the group. (I had to demand BoS from him, and even that did no good.)

Nother note.. ran my WSG daily last night on my sweet sweet precious Unbound. First half of the game the allies didn't know what they were facing. I was sitting on top of 5 ally corpses, wondering if I could find one to kill me so I could regen all my mana without blowing a water. Win 3-0, tops kills, kill blows, damage, flag recovers, and second in healing. (We hada disc priest running the flag...) AND A new windfury crit max, over 1k. Yeah, that number means nothing less you know shammies... but it was part of a windfury proc for 2.1 k damage, with a 850 earthshock. Thassa half life for most sub 70 chars. Maj didnt top 5k health till 70. I was even pwning the 69 ne hunter in the game. Course, he kept spamming serpent sting and frost, instead of freezing trap, and its kinda hard to out kite a shammy these days...

To behold the junipers shagged with ice,

Forgive me! Four days without a post. My dearest readers... how can I have forsaken you so?

Some tips. First... stop reading BRK. It's getting so that you can't refresh without another hacking report. I am naturally paranoid, I DONT NEED MORE STRESS! And how does that dwarf pervo deal with stress? By talking poor, underaged gnomes outta their clothes!

Second... some time ago Jabari linked to some awesome posts on the where and the why of macro writing. Melvin, of course, has to be forced at raid point to use anything so clever as a macro.

So we were doin Arena this weekend. Did rather well thursday, then spent all day saturday running into teams containing peeps with titles. Damned if I know why. Lost more than we won tho. Herk lost his damn mind... he gets fustrated easily... and the care and feeding of our holy pal proceeds apace...

"Taz, ya know... ya can clense polymorph, freeze traps and fears..."

"No I can't. I've tried before..."

"Er... (think for a second...) do you mean that you were polymorphed and tried to clense if offa you?"

"Yep! Didn't work!"

"K, see... no... it wouldn't... but you can get it offa OTHER people..."

I love taz... but it's one of these new player things... it takes some time to get them up to speed on what we all take for granted. Why is why I handle him with patience and respect. At least he tries, unlike say, my friend Melvin.

Speaking of friends... so we're having problems in Arena, and Herk starts losin his mind. Making all sortsa crazy statements... I wasn't helping with my responses. Taz was like... "so you guys been friends for a long time, eh?"

See... back when I got Herk into the evil game, I'd come visit him, and watch him play on his old system. Which sucked so hard, it had like a 5.0 fps in wetlands. And I'd.. er... subtly encourage him by cheering on the mobs he fought...

"Pig! Pig! Pig!"

And since he was new... and playing a warrior back when warriors really sucked... he'd die a lot. And get mad at me. I mean... REALLY mad. Steam outta the ears and all.

Its still like that. He hates to fail. And yet he sets himself up for it. And ya wanna know why?

Cuz Herk is Superman. You all know this personality trait. Superman shows up, sees the big tank, says something like... "look, violence isn't the solution..." and then the tank shoots him.

And as he gets up, there'sa expression on his face. "I can't believe they shot me... don't they know I'M SUPERMAN?"

It doesn't matter. They always get the first hit in, and Superman always takes it. You'd think he'd learn to dodge. Or decide, ya know, maybe I'll sit this one out. Can you imagine a universe where Superman always got his ass kicked? What hell that would be? Well, that's Herk right now.

Herk needs me to keep it in perspective. Who am I?

I'm Batman.

A long long time ago, DC decided to put together a title with their two biggest attractions... Superman and Batman. They called it the "World's Finest," as in world's finest detectives... cuz this was back when Batman was part of a genre called detective comics, with the likes of Dick Tracy. Problem is... Superman ain't a detective. He's muscle. Superman's strategy is to let people beat on him til they get tired, then smack them around. You know... just like a warrior.

Batman is different. Batman is always outnumbered, and the other side is always bigger, stronger, faster and crazier. Batman has to plan things out. Ahead of time. Pick the battlefield, set the traps, rely on gadgets when things get tough, get help where you can... you know, like a hunter. You get cornered... you get dead.

Warner Brothers did a wonderful Batman animated series. I mean, really, quite comparable to anything coming outta Japan. And they did a "World's Finest" story that did service to the two. Of course... in the WB series... Batman and Superman can't stand each other. They're forced by circumstance to work together.

Another analogy...

I've been following Naruto on cartoon network. I know some purists decry the dubbed version... well, Ima not gonna go outta my way to find the subbed version, and my Japanese sucks stones. Anyway, the Naruto vs Sasuke fight finally aired... and it was the single best animated fight sequence I've ever seen. The only thing I could compare it to was the original crow graphic novel. The art was amazing.

Anyway, I'm Sasuke, and Herk is Naruto, only without Naruto's work ethic.

Nother anime I've been following is Death Note. Apparently there's a live action version of it that the Chili Peppers sang the opening credit tune for.

And have been cold a long time

So Mabd hops into an EotS... look, nother hunter!

/inspect

+def gear! Oh dear lord, this will not be pretty...

Once again, the Dagashai secret of life.

We are all monumental idiots. But, thankfully, the world is so filled with drooling imbeciles we come off pretty good by comparison.

Some observations...

Is it just me, or is it normal to get creeped out by street people that keep crap in big old victoria's secrets bags?

I wonder by how many votes "Why buy the cow when you can get the steak for free" lost out to the eventual winner in THAT cliche competition?

I need to respec all three of my chars :(

Why are there SOOO damn many warriors in BG's an yet never a tank around?

And BTW, warriors... doan give yourself airs... you simply aint worth the effort to kill.

Do locks now outnumber mages? Stupid ultimate evil and its recruiting drives...

Now that pet leveling is reasonable, Ima gonna have a piggie, a nicer kitty, a mean old scorpid, an owlie... oh wait pet slots are still FUBAR, back to Rome season 2.

The best possible name for a kitty. "Puppy." Keeps em in their place. Plus confuses the hell outta everyone.

And exactly WHY can't I tame a resto druid? Imagine the fun of trying to use tame beast in arena...

The damage mechanic of soul link seems to break freeze trap. I doan like this. Mabd wants to freeze trap that LOLguard, and have him die while beating down his lock. Then she wants to take the demonsicle to all the orphans of Orgrimmar and give em a treat. Cuz she's sweet like that.

And another thing... has anyone actually seen the lock pet die offa SL damage? I haven't...

GET OFF THE DAMN BATTLEMASTER!

Majeure needs to respec frost. Shouldn't be hard, she's close to having the gear, just... do i really wanna run this many chars with my limited time?

Mabd needs revered with Violet Eye for that ammo. Mabd needs a kara guild. But wouldn't that just make me a douchebag if I join just for the faction runs? OTOH, that would get me my battlemaster trinket faster :)

Unbound, how I love shammies again. If only I could get you better weapons. /cry

BRK's little test dwarf makes me wanna change servers and head to darkshire with a box full o smores. Damn all pve servers to hell, anyway.

Its not that I'm antisocial, it's just that I love biochemical weapons...

So anyway... Melvin has me reading warhammer fantasy... and I have to admit ima kinda interested. I love how they do dwarves... all dwarf kingdoms have a sacred book that is the center of their culture and history... "The Book of Grudges." Of course, there's always the dwarven drinking song...

Of the pine-trees crusted with snow;

The world is a rum old place. I think here is as good a place as any to announce that my bestselling book on PvP, Arathi Basin: How to Cap a Flag, just went into its third edition.

Of course, most of you already own a copy, along with follow ups My Life and Times in AB: Cap the Damn Flag Already! and Whats Grey, Lonely, and Gives You Honor If You Cap It?

However, I'm not sure you've heard of the work I've done helping edit and publish the works of other, gifted PvP authors, books such as Are You There, Horde? It's Me, Uncapped Flag... and I Don't Want the Horde to Cap Me, I Just Want the Horde to Want to Cap Me, by A. Flag.

Anyway, the residuals are paying for my therapist bills. BG's are not going well. The last few days have been AV daily quests. 50 mins queue time does not fit into my "come home from work, screw around in WoW for half an hour, then pretend to be dead" routine.

Bugger. Equipment needs...
Mabd... 2min pvp trinket, bracer upgrade from season one (not sure if its worth upgrading the season 2 belt and boots...) and then onto battlemaster... although perhaps a detour into the pvp cloak (a down grade from what I have now, but with a ton of resil/sta)

Maj... Belt (and then I respec frost), pvp Cloak, necklace and ring. Goddamn, she's got a ways to go.

Unbound. Pretty much damn everything. If Unbound was my main, I could excuse trying Enhance in pvp for a bit. But that ain't happening.

I think PvP'ers have their revenge on the raiding crowd thats been clogging up our BG's. Theres no way to easily grind honor anymore. You really need to rack up HK's. And that just gets ugly. Spec since Raiders are pretty much pvp prey. Itsa strange situation. Mabd made 1400 honor offa AV the other day, 600 for the AV, 400 for the daily, and 400 offa HK's.

To regard the frost and the boughs

@Kirk. Yeah, I like Stevens. He gets a lot better after you realized he's more or less a one trick pony, and that it's a pretty neat trick. As long as you doan take him too seriously. My personal fav is Frost tho. Frost and Stevens were friends (their corrospondence is hilarious) and I have the sneaking suspicion that this poem was a dig at Frost... Also, for some strange reason, Ima big fan of the Metaphysicals and the Victorians. Herbert and Swinburne. My fav Swinburne story... a friend of his, concerned by his lack of... feminine company... got him a "date" with a famous gymnast ne courtesan. Later on the girl returned the fee, admitting she couldn't teach Swinburne that "biting was highly inappropriate..."

@Rats... grats on the first kill. Tho Mabd made a little snort of disgust and pointed out that that little psychopath Braids is probably killing every gnome she comes across till she finds the warlock that dared go into BG with less than 7k life.

Btw.. over the weekend... mabd scored the 10k th kill. And Maj is now over 1k. Unbound is getting there, but still only 68. And it looks more and more like Unbound is gonna be resto at 70, once I clear all the outland quests.

Av is still a nightmare... it was the BG daily twice, and had 1hr waits on both days... i've taken to just questing till the damn thing pops... tho Mabd has been doin Nagrand mining runs...

Meanwhile the ally guild ESF is now on my s$list. Unbound was questin in Nagrand when a 64 pally decided to try to gank her. WTH? One thing to remember when dealing with Enhance shammys... if you a melee class.. the enhance shammy WILL NOT RUN OUTTA MANA. It aint gonna happen. By the end of the fight, the pally had burnt bubble and insta heal, and then died, while Unbound was still at full mana and health. It takes a rogue, and massive stun lock to kill an enhance shammy... and thats what that pally prick did, sic'ced a 70 rogue guildmate on me afterwards, complete with s'mores kit. Goddamn vermin. Failed a gank and then called in his guild? KOS time buddies.

One must have a mind of winter

Thanks to those that liked the journey into Lewis Carrol. I started a new thread, one of my favorite poems, even if every douchbag Philosophy/Literature PhD uses it in their Dissertation...

And a coupla poem recommendations for BRK and the ex military crowd.

Tommy

and Gunga Din

Imma big fan of Kipling.

Anyway, the mailbag...

Dear Dagashai, Ima MM hunter, just going into arena. I was thinking 2v2... what class/spec should I look to for a partner?

Resto Druid.

Dear Dagashai, MM hunters suck. But my Enhance shammy is going into arena 2v2. What class spec should I partner with?

Resto Druid.

Dear Dagashai, does Mabd ever fear that with her internationally best selling swimsuit calendar achieving such notoriety, she might not be taken seriously as a hunter anymore? And tell her I love that Shadowmoon shot on the back of that dragon!

Strangely, the topic hasn't come up since she got her season 3 axe. And my personal fav is the Nagrand shot in front of the garadar wolf riders... the squished dwarf at her feet gives nice apposition to her demure, more traditional femininity.

Dear Dagashai, Ima resto druid, looking to get into arena 2v2. What should I look for in a teammate?

The best partner for you would be another resto druid.

and whether pigs have wings...

Just cap the freaking flag. Do you understand? JUST CAP THE FREAKING FLAG. If you near it, cap it. If someone else is capping, keep the other side the hell offa them until its done.

Ran up to LM in AB with Mabd, right behind a warrior. The warrior stops to cap, I move to other side to intecept in incoming druid. Scattershot.
Freeze trap.

Then the warrior stops the capping process to charge the ice trapped elf.

I think I broke some blood vessels screaming at my monitor.

OTOH, last night, I went into the mine. Stupid little dwarven priest defending... scattershot

lay freeze trap

start capping.

He trinkets outta teh SS and walks right into the freeze trap. Flag cap. Then I kill him. I got just one question...

If I /laugh at him, will that break the flag cap channel?

Sigh.. as for Enhance shammy pvp...

It didn't happen. There was no such beast. After 70, when you run into resil, all those talents that proc on crits just go away. Arena with an enhance shammy was like Arena with a holy priest. You just gonna be a lamb to the slaughter.

Now with the Shamanistic Fury talent, there might be a chance. 30% reduced damage for 30 secs is HUGE. A shammy pain suppresion. And the +spell power offa attack power adds a great deal of healing and non physical damage to the table. Unbound was trashing a coupla 69 warriors in BG last weekend. (Tho last night I ran into a prot warrior that just annoyed the HELL outta me. Shield bash silence spamming scumbag!)

Still, rogues will eat yo lunch. Sigh.

I dunno. I'm torn between trying enhance for a while at 70, and jumping straight to resto. I KNOW resto is almost unstoppable. And there is always the critical and dire need for healers. Still enhance is an awsome rush... What's the opinion? Let me have some input... I could easily have the honor for the dual season one weapons for when I turn 70, and then try enhance for a while... With the major talent changes, Enhance might really become viable. Or is it a pipe dream? Am I just being the shammy version of a ret (pal) noob?

And it's been a while since a non WoW item... here's one of my new pet peeves... Papa John's.

First... Arlington pizza is so wretched, I would consider Papa John's outta desperation. But not too seriously... still, I look at the flyer and... No phone number! WTH? How can you try to sell pizza delivery without putting your number on the damn flyer? Its all, "CHECK US OUT ONLINE!" and "LOOK US UP IN THE PHONE BOOK!"

Then they want your address and personal info before you can even look at the menu. What part of "screw that" do they not understand? My attention span is short. I'm not gonna spend 10 min creating an account to order a goddamn pizza. I can pick up the phone and have a pizza in 10 min from your competitors...

It is at this point that I urge you to sell any Papa John's stock you have. Any company this freakin clueless is doomed.

why the sea is boiling hot...

Unbound's baby BG's are an incresing delight for me. This last WSG.. well... I was showing it to Melvin (his comment... everyone else on yuir team must have sucked) when I realized I led in healing as much as in damage. And the only reason the Allies capped a flag was because we started down 4 peeps. Thanks again Blizz.

The grand, master plan was to get Unbound to 70 and then go resto. I still want to... but enhance is just so much fun. And healers get treated like crap in this game. Sigh. Then there's the question on how to gear her.

Arena is hitting a bad spot. My 3v3 team is developing fractures. Melvin's crew is always there, but well... you know my feelings about that. Mabd is up to 277 Resil, almost 11k health, and 33% (!!) crit. I should be able to do better... I think? Maybe some 2v2 with my pally friend... Hunter/Pally as a combo?

How about Holy Pal/Resto Shammy? Just for the screams of fustration?

of cabbages and kings...

47 min av queue.
Ouch. The days of honor farming are over. So peeps with tons of pvp items now might have an insurmountable head start...

Oh, and how bad is Melvin's arena team?

They asked Maj to fill in, and pugged a 47/14 BM hunter. Maj has 80 resil, 7500 health, and is arcane spec...

Quote of the night. "Mana burn just doesn't do enough damage to use in arena..." -Emp.

Melvin quote of the night... "I remembered to use Blood Lust that time!"

And sealing wax...

First of all...

Die alliance.

Second...

Die alliance.

Third... zball, if you still running with less than 7k health, Mabd won't even bother with you, just let you run from the cat till yuir little legs fall off.

But no, I would be loathe to pass up the opportunity, as a commited member of the horde, to rub in the mediocrity of the alliance when given the chance. So, QQ babies... wah. That being said, if you allies are willing to admit thrall is a bazillion times cooler than that poser sleeping with the lizard, or that loser dwarf whose daughter ran off with the elvis impersonator, we can have a meaningful conversation... (doan even get me started about how creepy the whole walking tree thing is...)

To wit... why the hell can't bliz fix AV so that the games last 40 min or so?

Look. This, to my eyes, is the way the BG's should go...

WSG... 10 min
AB... 15-20 min
EoTS... 20-25 min
AV... 30-40 min

Currently... WSG averages the longest while outside the 5 cap AB, AV is the shortest run. This is crazy! Whatever Blizz does... both sides figure out a way to shorten it down. Magebert claims to have lost six in a row to the allies, all 12 min games where they run down to the village, cap the relief hut, then cycle through killin drek. I was in a game where the allies lost by taking 50 deaths against drek. Other than this.. allies lose. A lot.

Itsa horde thing, I think. We're ALWAYS outnumbered. And allies zerg like vermin fleeing a burning rat farm. Melvin is bitching cuz he hates the thought that he might never see the blood lord again. I hate that I cant use the damn air force for base defense. (I always get the snowfall guy goin... snowfall! What the hell do i need air cover over snowfall for?) Blizz might wanna put more traps in the game for zergers... and more honor rewards for in game accomplishments. As it is, the mines are a joke. And massive zergs rob the whole ram/wolf riders and air force of their usefulness. Maybe move these guys to mid field locations where they can be activated to retake yuir home base? And maybe make it so if the head general is under attack, EVERY npc in the base aggros to his defense?

Nother thing... put the marshals in the towers (after retooling em.. how about diff marshals with diff powers, and random placement.. damn, its the WW warrior marshal!). No reason for em to be with the general. That'll make the towers a major endevour, and make the initial attack something significant. And instead of marshals backing up the general, give him a buff of some kind for every tower still intact. Personally, I like summons :)

And screw the ram/wolf thing. I want more wandering pats of goons, and I want them to spawn during the game... when I turn in armor... let it mean something. Oh, and give em nets. And damn near infinite aggro range.

Would it be that hard to come up with a nice 45 min BG that gives about 500-800 honor, and with several workable strategies?

Then there's WSG. Imagine how much fun this would be if only one side could hold a flag at a time. Lots more blood shed, no more turtling, and 10 min games, so you could go through em like popcorn.

Sigh... I know. Pipe dreams. So, should unbound go resto at 70?

Oh, and just to let you know how suicidal I am these days... I saw a mage drinkin water next to an uncapped flag in AB yesterday. Unbound led in kills AND flag captures. This is WRONG. My path to enlightenment has led me to the point where I see my char leading the board in kills as a sign of the inferiority of my team... and not any real accomplishment on MY part. I doan mind losin. I mind losin due to bad play. Ah well, hopeful arena will provide more moral support. Mabd gets the season three legs next week, and should have the pvp ring saturday.

Of ships and shoes...

Is it just me, or are BG's becoming disfunctional?

Comment overheard in general chat last week...

"I don't recall alliance whining like this when all they had to do was walk through our village and cap drek!"

So yeah, the whole AV thing is getting old. However, there are serious problems developing on the other side... to wit, it is time to end the ability to opt out of a bg for another bg...

Too many hordies are simply playin in WSG, or whatever, racking honor kills, while waiting for AV to pop. This is killing our ability to actually fight a cohesive battle, while making AV wait times even more egregious. You wanna double queue? Fine. But when that BG pops, you should be stuck there. Desertion in the face is desertion in the face.

And lets face it. BG's are starting to get ugly. I've been reduced to running BG's with my 60-69 group shammy, simply for the much more relaxed and professional atmosphere... too many nubs start BG's when they hit 70, and have no clue what the hell is going on.

Now, normally, naturally, this wouldn't matter. But for some reason, Blizz wants to make arena an e-sport. For that... you gonna have to force players to be competitive. Honor rewards for capping or rescuing flags? I dunno. WSG is seriously silly. I think there should only be one flag held in the game at any time. Once, for example, allies grab the horde flag... the alliance flag disappears, and vice versa. This would end the standoff silliness that pervails in WSG.

OTOH, played a pair of games over the weekend that rocked. had the dual flag standoff, with Mabd defending the resto druid holding the flag. The druid yells.. "screw this! I'm getting our flag back, and you idiots better follow me!" and takes off for the other base. We get our flag back, then run back to our keep to cap. Great fun, awesome player, that druid.

Then Maj was in same situation... goes to ally keep with two feral druids and two rogues... allies holding the flag in the GY, all 7 of em. So the stealthies go in first, then maj pops up, fires off the POM pyro, fire blast and arcane on the bear holding the flag... and while the six people who were supposed to be defending the bear jumped maj, our rogues and druids finished the job. Damn, Maj can do some good burst.

As for AV... simply admit the allies are QQ babies, and that the new rules screw them with the current set up as hard as the old ones helped them. I mean, really...its insane how little opposition they face running to the FW aid station. Meanwhile, horde has to practically burn down everything in its path...

Anyway, maybe if you make snowfall alliance held at the start.